Archive for the Category »Parenting Philosophy «

26
Aug
Homeschooling, private schooling, oh my.

I think helping your child receive a good education is one of the biggest gifts you can bestow on him. Right now I am wrestling with the decision over how to have our Wee Beasts educated.

We live in Kansas City, MO, and if you aren’t familiar with the school district here, do a quick Google search and prepare to be shocked and appalled at what you find.

I do not want my kids to go through the KC public schools. And since we just moved one year ago, I’m not ready to pack up and move across the state line into Kansas (even though it’s just two blocks away) just for the sake of being in a different school district. So here are the options I’m considering:

Homeschooling

I really want to homeschool my kids. It’s something I’ve wanted to do since before I had kids. I told The Doc my dreams before we were even married. But he was a medical school student at the time, and I was the breadwinner and couldn’t even imagine not going to work every day.

Times have changed, though. We now have two beasts, 3 and 4 years old. The Doc’s business is growing and we now even live in a house that would have space for a dedicated “school room.”

I’ve been reading up on the laws in Missouri and what homeschooling is like here. I’ve even found a plan that I really love. The K12 program, which is an online public school. BUT…it’s not in our state yet. Kansas, yes. Missouri, no. Of course. BAH! And now I’ve started a home-based business, and I’m getting new clients on a regular basis. I’m worried I won’t have the ability to juggle client time and school time if I’m trying to cram both in during the day.

Private Schooling

I took Big A to an Open House at a local private school last winter. He loved it and was so excited to have a new school to go to. Poor kid didn’t realize he had another 18 months to go before he could start there, but private schools tend to have waiting lists so we had to check into it early. It’s a small school, with the current Kindergarten class consisting of six kids. Yes, you read that right. Six. 6. That’s it. They have plans to grow it some so that he might start with 8-12 kids in a class. I think it’s awesome that he would get so much individual attention that way, and that the teacher would really know how he’s doing in each area and could tailor work with him to be exactly what he needs.

It’s a great option, but I decided to keep exploring what else is available to us.

Charter Schooling

I just discovered an amazing charter school yesterday. It’s a short seven-minute drive from our house. Even though it’s technically a KC public school, it’s run by Central Missouri State University.

The best part is that it’s a language immersion school. Ah-may-zing! I’ve always wanted to speak another language. Despite owning every Menudo album in Spanish in my junior high years, taking Spanish in high school for two years and one year in college, it didn’t “stick.” Surprising? No. If you don’t use it, you lose it.

But with an immersion school, you use the language all day, every day. For everything. Starting from “hello” (or “hola,” “bonjour,” or “gutten tag”) on the first day of kindergarten, the teachers only speak to the kids in another language. I wish I could go to an immersion school and learn a new language. But since I can’t, I could send my beasts to one.

Learning a second language expands your mind. It allows you to pick up even more languages later in life fairly easily. And with native-speaking teachers from around the world, it would be a phenomenal cultural experience. Oh, and most importantly, test scores from the school’s students show that they are really smart and do very well in school. They tend to be recruited by top-notch private schools and colleges later, with many receiving sizable scholarships because of their grades. YEA!
So…

What to do?

The charter school usually has more kids apply than they have spots for. So kids are enrolled based on a lottery system. That means I can apply for one of the spots, but the decision is really out of my hands. IF Big A gets a spot, Little A would automatically get one the following year. IF he doesn’t get a spot, we’re out of luck.

Then my decision would be between homeschooling and private school. Depending on how my business is going (growing), I might be able to hire some staff and only need to be in a management role. I’d be able to homeschool without too much conflict.

Realistically, the decision my end up being made for me by life circumstances. But I’m a thinking, a brooder, and very contemplative, let’s-just-weigh-all-the-options-and-compare-pros-and-cons-of-each kinda girl. So I’ll be thinking of this day and night for the next few months.

If you’ve wrestled with this decision yourself, I would love some feedback, advice, thoughts, stories to know how you handled it, and if you’re happy with the choice you made.

Category: Parenting Philosophy, Random Thoughts  Tags: , , ,  5 Comments
06
May
Percy the Tank Engine

If you have kids, I’m sure you’ve heard of Thomas the Tank Engine.

But have you heard of Percy the Tank Engine? If not, let me introduce you to him by way of a quick glance at a room of my house.

This is the current state of my master bathroom toilet:

Do you see him in there? That’s cute, little Percy. He’s taking a swim. In my toilet.

Hence my new name for him: Percy the (Toilet) Tank Engine.

Now, technically I know he’s in the bowl, not the tank. But work with me here. It’s funny.

It’s a lot more funny than me having to put my hands in the toilet to get him out. That’s not funny at all. It’s gross.

And that’s why my wee beasts think that Percy is gone forever.

You see, I consider myself lucky that Big A is 4 1/2 years old and this is the first time anything non-toilet-worthy has ended up in there. It’s an experience all parents have at some point, but up until today, I had escaped it.

This morning, Little A (who is still fighting potty-training even though his third birthday is now one month away) decided he wanted to play with the potty by throwing toilet paper in. The only problem is that he also had Percy in his hand and didn’t stop to think that when he opened his fingers to toss the paper, Percy would go with it.

The looks of horror on the wee beasts’ face was priceless. And it gave me a opportunity for a “teachable moment.”

(Oh, it also brought back painful memories of how my mom flushed my precious binkie right before my eyes when I was a child, but I won’t share that trauma with you today.)

With wide eyes, the beasts asked if I was going to rescue Percy and get him out of the toilet. “Nope,” I said. “Toilets are dirty and filled with germs. Anything that goes in, goes off to the ocean. It can’t come back out or it will make you sick.”

And that’s when the waterworks started. Not from the plumbing but from the beasts. The tears, the wailing, the sobbing of how suddenly Percy was their favorite train and that they were so sad without him.

Note: he was not, in fact, the favorite train of either of them. They were, in fact, using him as a weapon and throwing him at each other moments before. But they are allowed to have revisionist’s history at their age, I suppose.

In the middle of the meltdowns, I marched them off down the hall so we could head out to school. All the while, I was chanting to myself “Don’t forget he’s in there, don’t forget, don’t forget.” I never intended to flush him. I wouldn’t do that to our plumbing pipes. But I don’t want the beasts to know that.

And since they can’t read yet, I can safely tell you that I did fish Percy out and give him (and my hand) a thorough scrubbing with a lot of hot soapy water. He is drying out in a hiding spot and will remain there until one day when they need a little pick-up. I’ll magically produce him and be a hero. Or heroine. Of the non-drug-using type. You know what I mean.

The lessons of the day are as follows:

  • Toilets are yucky and have germs.
  • Things that go in the toilet don’t come back out of the toilet.
  • Mommy is mean today.
  • Mommy will be a hero tomorrow.
  • Oh, and toilet water is really cold. But if you have kids, I’m guessing you already knew that!
Category: Funny Stuff, Parenting Philosophy, Tales from Mommyland  Tags: , , , , , ,  Leave a Comment
15
Mar
Am I doing a good job?

Big A recently started asking this question at night.

The wee beasts share a room, so naturally, at bedtime one of them typically wants to go to sleep and the other wants to play. Little A, being younger and needing more sleep, was usually the one who laid quietly while Big A jumped and squirmed and yelled for The Doc or myself to give him another drink or pull up his covers.

But the tide has turned recently and now Little A is the one who won’t settle down. Big A has morphed into Big Brother A who is determined to set a good example. He will stay quiet and still…for a while. But then his voice carries over the crackling static on the monitor and he asks, “Mom, am I doing a good job staying quiet?” Well, yes, until the verbal question rang out into the night.

The Doc and I have found this amusing and sweet over the past couple of weeks, but now it’s hitting a deeper nerve in me.

Why is my precious little boy finding the need to ask that question? Am I not doing MY JOB of telling him when he is good, of using positive reinforcement more than griping at him with a laundry list of things he’s doing wrong?

As parents, we have all heard that telling your child when he is doing something right will lead to more good behavior and that negative attention just leads to more negative actions. But honestly it is so easy to miss the good behavior, isn’t it? When I’m in the kitchen cooking supper and the beasts are playing nicely, I tend to focus on cooking rather than making a point to run into the room to tell them they are being good. When we’re out shopping, if they are getting along and staying quiet, I hurry through our list and simply dole out the occasional “uh huh” when they say something to me.

But if one raises his voice or hits or knocks over toys or pulls the dog’s hair or spills milk all over the table or…

Well, you get the idea. When one does something wrong, it’s so easy to jump in with a “Why weren’t you paying attention?” or “How many times have I told you…” or “Time out!”

Again, you get the idea.

But now I have to say to myself “Why weren’t you paying attention to the good things?” and “How many times have I told you to praise the boys more often?” and “You need a time out to figure out how to be a better parent!”

This time, I’m going to listen. And I have promised myself and my sweet little wee beasts that I will tell them more often when they are doing a good job so that they never have to ask.

Hopefully soon, I’ll be able to ask, “Boys, am I doing a good job?” And they will be able to honestly reply, “Yes.”

Category: Parenting Philosophy, Tales from Mommyland  Tags: , ,  Leave a Comment
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